This week’s Torah reading contains a rare occurrence, where we read combined portions of two Parshiot, Chukat and Balak. The reason for this ‘double Parsha’ is to synchronize the Torah reading inside and outside of the land of Israel. In years like this one, when Shavuot falls on a Friday, the diaspora’s two-day celebration includes Shabbat, whereas the one-day holiday observed in Israel only occurs on Friday. This slight difference causes those outside of Israel to fall a week behind, and we re-align our readings by combining these two portions of Chukat and Balak.
However, as with other double portions, there is a deeper meaning behind the combination of these Parshiot. Parshat Chukat is filled with the theme of death. It begins by discussing the laws of tahara [purification] when someone comes into contact with a corpse and then provides accounts of Miriam's and Aharon's deaths, which is followed by the death sentence of Moshe. It culminates with the narrative about God sending a plague of poisonous snakes, which, according to the Zohar, symbolized death.
Our Sages interpret the verse “אדם כי ימות באהל” [When a man dies in a tent] allegorically to mean that “אין דברי תורה מתקיימים אלא במי שממית עצמו עליה” [the words of Torah can only endure in a person who is willing to dedicate themselves completely to Torah, even to the point of sacrificing their life]. Unfortunately, some people misinterpreted this during the pandemic, wrongly believing that Torah study justified risking their lives. Of course, the Sages’ interpretation does not advocate literal suicide for the sake of Torah study. However, it does imply that death is a necessary element in genuine Torah study. Why is this the case?
I think the explanation is connected to another feature of our calendar. This week also marks the beginning of the ‘Three Weeks,’ a period of mourning during which we reflect on the misdeeds of our ancestors and mourn our exile following the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash in Jerusalem. Why do we mourn in this way each year? Why does the Jewish calendar contain numerous days of mourning? What message does that convey?
I believe the answer lies in the word for mourning, "aveilut," which shares its root word, "aval," with two meanings: "definitive" and "but/however," a word of transition. Aveilut, or mourning, therefore, has two goals: to help us definitively accept the reality of loss and to transition, in a healthy manner, to a new life without our departed loved ones.
Parshat Chukat teaches us that to navigate life effectively, we must learn to understand and accept death and loss as inherent aspects of life itself. But how can we embrace death and loss when they are often so difficult to process?
I believe this is the essence of what our Sages mean when they refer to “killing oneself over Torah." When we dedicate ourselves to Torah study, it means we recognize that to truly understand Torah, we must not view it solely from the limited perspective of this world. Instead, we comprehend that there is much more to life than the physical realm: There is the spiritual world of Torah. Although the Torah does not explicitly mention the World to Come, intensive and profound Torah study leads us to recognize that this world cannot be everything. There must be a spiritual world awaiting us, which makes facing death more palatable.
The Sages add an important clarification to the words of the prayer of Yigdal: “לא קם בישראל כמשה עוד – אבל בעומות קם” [No one has arisen among Israel like Moses – but among the nations, Bilaam arose]. Bilaam was a prophet as great as Moses, yet they were fundamentally different. Moses understood and lived his life knowing that there is life after death, while Bilaam did not. Although Moses cherished this world for its unique opportunities, he based his life on the reality of the World to Come. On the other hand, Bilaam, lacking the belief in a meaningful afterlife, believed he could act with impunity.
As our Sages explain, Bilaam could discern the one millisecond each day when God (metaphorically speaking) was angry, providing him with an opportunity to curse people.
אֶלָּא, מְלַמֵּד שֶׁהָיָה יוֹדֵעַ לְכַוֵּין אוֹתָהּ שָׁעָה שֶׁהַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא כּוֹעֵס בָּהּ
Rather, this verse from Numbers teaches that Balaam was able to precisely determine the hour that the Holy One, Blessed be He, is angry. At that moment, Balaam would utter his curse and, through God’s anger, it would be fulfilled. [Brachot 7a]
In other words, when Bilaam perceived flaws or imperfections in God's actions within this world, he arrogantly concluded that he could defy God and leverage those moments to dedicate his life to evil without consequences.
Therefore, our two Parshiot complement one another: Parshat Chukat reminds us of the undeniable reality of death and the need to confront and connect with our mortality. However, Parshat Balak emphasizes that confronting mortality should not lead us to adopt a negative or hopeless perspective on life, as Bilum did. On the contrary, Bilaam's story teaches us that without an understanding of an afterlife, our lives become devoid of meaning.
Fortunately, we have the Torah, which bestows upon us the precious opportunity to experience the spiritual essence of the next world within our present reality, thereby infusing our existence with profound significance. Shabbat Shalom.
Shabbat Shalom
Eliezer Hirsch